‘Grief Song’ by Karlee Rene Bowlby

To me, ‘Scotland’ is a place of healing and belonging. It is a beautiful and storied place, a rich tapestry that invites me to take up the tangled threads of my own life and to incorporate them into the existing design. In so doing, I both change and am changed by this place. Though we are distinct, we belong to one another. 

 I’m an American who studied abroad in Scotland for a term as an undergraduate, but I never forgot how at home I had felt here during that spring. To live and breathe in a place like this, to dwell here, had felt so right. Both the natural and manmade environment have a beautiful, enchanted quality that awakened wonder, gratitude, contemplation, and creativity in me. It was as though I was coming home to myself, as though I was a creature experiencing its native environment for the first time. I’ve suffered two major losses in my life since then and each time, I’ve remembered the way Scotland made me feel at home and have returned to it. I feel committed to this place now. I love getting to know its seasons, its flora and fauna, its culture and history. These things create a safe, stable foundation on which I feel I can rebuild my life, they are good soil into which I can send down roots and start to grow again. 

To me, ‘home’ is a place of rest and safety. It’s a place where you know and are known. It offers beauty, comfort, and familiarity. It holds and nourishes you. It welcomes you when you are weary and it sends you out refreshed.   

I do feel connected to Scotland. It’s the place I have chosen to put down roots. Life is unpredictable and full of loss, but this place and its story outlive all of that instability. By committing to this place, by weaving myself into its narrative, our stories become shared. My story is part of Scotland, and Scotland’s story is part of me. We bear witness to one another.